Open Letters...

Dear Son…

We’re ready for you to come out now! Your room is decorated, you have a nice cozy place to sleep and a whole room to yourself if you so desire. The finishing touches have been put into place, so now we need a baby to come and occupy our lives, we have been waiting almost 10 months you know!

If I can meet you soon I would be most grateful.

Yours forever,
Dad


Dear World Cup,

I knew I was right to keep faith in you. I told you that the second round of games are now must win and will get more exciting. You’re welcome. Thank you for offering football for a whole month, right now, you’re one of my favourites.

Thank you also for scheduling my three countries to play today. The German quarter of me will be cheering at 12.30pm, the American side (which I know, I technically haven’t got one… but have fairly significant ties) will be vuvuzelaing at 3.00pm and the English ¾’s going crazy come 7.30. What a day.

Yours for a month more,
Phil

Dear world,

We will tell you when the baby comes… no need to keep asking! The standard response to “any signs yet” will continue to be “have you heard anything??”

Thanks,
Mean Old Man


Dear Freebie Friday,

Thank you for putting your leftover sandwiches out in the canteen at 2 o’clock… double lunch is unnecessary, but I’ll take it. Every week.

Never hungry on Fridays,
Phil

What's Hot, What's Not...

Dear Cars all over the world,

Cyclists have rights too. Just because you have the horsepower, doesn’t mean I am not allowed to overtake you. Just because you’re bigger, it doesn’t mean you don’t have to look in your mirrors when you turn. A cycle lane is for cycling, not for parking, and certainly not for swerving into when you’ve made a mistake or aren’t concentrating.

I don’t have a hooter… if I need to, I will shout to make my presence known – if you don’t like it, please suggest a suitable alternative.

A helmet doesn’t make me indestructible.

That is all… for now. The vendetta may continue.

What’s Hot, What’s Not…

Wind… I don’t like you. You only seem to make things worse.

Spooner… I like you. Liz is always in a good mood after spending two and a half hours talking to you.

Guitar… I like you, but please stop hurting my fingers. I caress your strings as often as I can.

In other News…

Two years ago yesterday, Liz agreed to marry me. My life has never been the same since. A whirlwind of adventure has ensued in a non-stop fashion; if a montage was created of the last two years it would definitely be set to a high tempo song with lots going on, as opposed to Aqualung’s Strange and Beautiful. We managed to get married, have operations, have fun holidays, and are on the brink of our first child popping out. We’ve had weddings, funerals, baby dedications, special birthday parties, have 2 god-children, have seen both sets of parents become grandparents… a huge amount has happened in just two years. Was there really ever a time that I wasn’t married?? It seems peculiar that there may have been.

Liz is my favourite person on this world… that I get to spend every day with her for the rest of my life is kind of overwhelming, I am a blessed man. Her commitment to me is beyond question, just as I’d do anything for her. At the risk of sounding cheesy, it is 100% the grace of God on our lives that blesses us in this inexplicable way. How the heck did a girl grow up an ocean apart from me, mature into the most amazing woman, then somehow end up with a wet Englishman… crazy. I am wholly bemused by this!

Thanks for an amazing two years, Liz!